Being Influenced

I can not mention the amount of blog posts and instagram stories I have seen on how to become the next influencer. How to be noticed for your ideas and your opinions. It made me realize that whether I am aware of it or not I am taking in a large amount of information everyday.

So, I wanted to come up with a system for myself that would help lower my anxiety upon taking in opinions and advice from the outside world. Whether that be from a family member, friend, or strangers. Because let us be honest, everyone has an idea on how to live life.

How I choose to influenced

I ask myself these questions….

1. Who is this information coming from?
2. Did I ask for their opinion?
3. Do I respect their over all life style choices, even if I dont agree with everything?
4. Are they using fear as a way to manipulate my emotions?
5. Are they using guilt as a way to change my behavior?
6. Am I comparing myself and my abilities to someone?
7. Have I processed and digested the information thoroughly, and done my own research?
8. Did I feel convicted and inspired after hearing this information?
9. Is this something I am ready to process now or should I save for later when have the mental energy to process properly.

Diving Deeper

1. Is this a family member, trusted friend, social media friend, an influencer I chose to follow, or someone I just happened to fall upon with scrolling? We need to remember we can chose who speaks into our lives on a life changing level. Not everyone deserves a place in your mental energy to process their opinions. This isn’t even saying that strangers are always wrong or known people are always right either.
2. Even trusted people can give opinions without being asked. It is ok to be polite but move on and dump stuff out if you weren’t looking for a new way to sleep train, dress, protect, think, pray ect. I am not saying all unsolicited advice is wrong. Advice is freely given without permission and you have permission to freely ignore or move on since it was never payed for anyway.
3. Trust. Building trust with people is huge on how I take their opinions and advice. When they have walked alongside me, and I with them, it is much easier to listen. Because they have an idea of what I value love and respect and I of them. Even still, will we always line up in our thinking? No way! As friends and family we have room for opinions, thoughts, processing and information in a together kind of way.
4. Fear. Fear is a marketing tool. It’s also manipulation from time to time. I refuse to be manipulated by being scared. There are scary things in the world! I am not going to change my life based on a scary statistic or fear inducing words on a billboard or headline. Number 7 is important.
5. Guilt. Guilt is something that comes from darkness, loneliness, isolation, and fear. Guilt influenced me a lot as a new mom when I saw moms proclaiming they had found the healthiest, safest, best, whatever it was. I instantly felt guilty if I was doing it differently and would try and change through tears, frustration, and without conviction. It was ultimately fruitless.
6. Comparison. Am I mkaing myself as higher than or lesser as the person who shared this? Because if I am reading this with pride am I being willing to change for the better? I am reading this with low self esteem and a feeling of being incapable to their high standards. Neither attitudes are helpful to growth.
7. Research research research. Learn for yourself, google, read, and form your own opinions before you make changes. You want to feel confident moving forward. Don’t take someone elses word for it.
8. Conviction. This is the opposite of guilt. It leads to change for the better, you feel empowered, strong, and excited. Conviction doesn’t mean you always feel that, but it comes from a place of willingness. This is true inspiration. It can even happen in a time of recognizing your own or others wrong doing. Write it down and do something about it.
9. It is ok to find something you want to dive deeper into but don’t have the capacity for now. Have a to revisit list, write it down and come back when you want too and can. Don’t overwhelm yourself with fitting in every piece of advice and opinions at once. Edpecially things you weren’t even aware you needed to have an opinion on

I hope this helps as we wade through a world of information and influences ❤